“In avoiding all pain and seeking comfort at all cost, we may be left without intimacy or compassion; in rejecting change and risk we often cheat ourselves of the quest; in denying our suffering we may never know our strength or our greatness.”
― Rachel Naomi Remen, Kitchen Table Wisdom: Stories that heal.
"I don’t know where to go from here. I never feel at ease or joy. I never feel enough no matter what I do. I just feel anxiety or nothing."
I’m here to tell you, that you are not alone.
I imagine that there is a part of you that feels compelled to work hard for your worth. If you do just one more thing maybe you can rest and be at ease, but it never stops and you are EXHAUSTED.
You might not get why, but you are suspecting that there might be something wrong with you.
“Why am I this way?”
You might feel like you have everything you need, but you are still disappointed in life. There’s the niggling feeling, that there is more out there, but not for you, you can’t have it. The crippling chronic sense emptiness takes over sometimes. You have tried to fill it with other things, like food, relationships or alcohol. You have tried to find other quick fixes, but it’s not working.
To be fair, is that not the continuous message you have been getting since you can remember. That you are just not quite measuring up. So it has seeped into your every cell. At the same time when you look back it might have seemed like you had what you needed, practically, but emotionally you had to manage on your own. Where was it all suppose to go? Let me tell you, it all turned inwards.
Untangling ourselves from the intricate web of not-enoughness, inadequacy, and persistent anxiety and depression is an incredibly challenging journey—one that is difficult to navigate alone.
Why is that?
Admitting you need help can be the last thing on your mind when you are used to managing your internal world all on your own. There might even be shame around needing someone else, and deep fear about letting someone into your vulnerability, because you are not used to having a safe other person with you. But, in this moment, you are not able to contain it anymore, and it feels overwhelming and you feel like a mess, it is manifesting in your body with a tight stomach, discomfort in your throat and chest.
Sometimes you have the feeling of wanting to escape from your own body.
You might be replaying conversations in your head, silently criticising yourself for simply being who you are. Sometimes you make a go for it, you workout, you step away from social media, you eat well and you do the “right” thing, only to wake up the next day trapped in the same self-defeating patterns.
You might be thinking that: ”If I could just _____, then everything would be better."
Despite the continuous effort, painful self-beliefs, joy and ease remains elusive. The constant striving to be better and different leaves you feeling anxious and exhausted. Maybe you even wondered whether you are truly enough for your own life and the lives of those around you.
I need you to know, that you have always been enough, there is nothing wrong with you.
There is nothing to fix! You are not fundamentally broken, and there's no need to exhaust yourself covering it up.
If you have come here because your challenges seems to be getting more intense, rather than diminish, it can be scary.
But I want you to know: I can help. Together, we'll navigate through all these these parts, not-enoughness, anxiety, depression, and inadequacy in your inner community.
Slowly, you will realise that you already had all the goodness inside of you that you needed and that you will start to embrace your perfectly imperfect self along the way.
So What is this Therapy thing?
Can it really work? It sounds good, maybe you can find a solution to your problem in therapy. I’m here to tell you there is no quick fix to what you are going through, what you need is SAFETY, PRESENCE and CURIOSITY to DARE to get closer to the truth that has lived inside if you all this time, covered in decades of dust and mudd.
What Therapy Is:
You have all the reasons in the world to doubt and be sceptical that therapy is the right things for you. I know you want to do things on your own.
Therapy takes time, and you’re used to avoid what’s going on or swish on by.
Therapy can be painful, it often feels harder for a while, when you meet what you have been burying for so long. You will cry, you will be scared and confused, and I will be there tending to parts of you that are coming into the light.
Therapy can save your life, enable you to wake up to you and what’s around you. So you can start living the life you were meant for, and not the life you though you should live.
What Therapy Isn’t:
Therapy isn’t just for people with big feelings on the outside that everyone can see. It’s also for those of us, containing it all inside, but it is hurting.
Therapy is not a quick fix. It will take time. It has to take time.
Therapy isn’t cheap. Shifting your internal world and falling in love with yourself, is a big investment, emotionally and financially.
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